Friday, December 21, 2012

Bald... Again...

I thought I had prepared myself to be bald again.  There are just some things you can't prepare for.  I was definitely not prepared to mourn the loss of my hair again.  I thought it was old news...been there...done that.  Not so for me.  I am sad to have to be bald again.  Even though I didn't like my short hair at all, I loved the fact that I was no longer looking like a cancer patient.  Tonight I shaved my head again and as I was shaving it I found myself welling up with tears.  So silly... to get choked up over hair... especially when I had so little of it.

I haven't updated my blog in a while.  It takes energy and I have to prioritize what I spend my energy on.  This past week I have spent my energy on hand washing, disinfecting, and keeping all the sickies away from me and Zeek.  We both stayed healthy until I got my immune system back on track.  Last Thursday and Friday I got my Neupogen shot to boost my immune system.  I had my blood work done on Friday afternoon and my counts were back up.  Sunday I got a sore throat and a little bit of nasal congestion.  So I have a cold but I didn't get it as bad as everyone else and it wasn't bad enough to prevent my treatment on Monday.  Three taxol treatments done.  Nine to go.

8 comments:

  1. I'll mourn the loss of your hair along with you. I won't say "I understand" because I've never had to deal with that. Having to lose two of the things that make you feel like a woman (boobs and hair) is difficult but that's not what makes you beautiful. It's your shining light that radiates from within your heart. Your positive attitude, your love for your family and your fierce courage are what make you beautiful. Stay strong my friend <3
    Kelly Lagomarsino

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    1. Thanks, Kelly! You have no idea how much it means to me to read this right now. Sometimes just having someone say kind things can make such a huge difference in my day. Thank you, thank you!

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  2. Rebecca, I'm catching up on your blog and I continue to be absolutely blown away by your courage and determination to not let anything get in your way! You are such an amazing person and I am in awe of you. You are so real with what's happening to you and yet you always find a way to get back on track. Keep up the blog girl--it will make a good book someday! "Zeek" is a gem, as you know! What a doll! God is so very great!!! Love you, Karen

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    1. It means so much to me that you follow my blog. It really does make me feel loved and feeling loved makes me feel pretty darn good. Love you!

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    2. My sister in law found out that she had colon cancer, stage 3B back in late October. She's been through so much...her husband committed suicide, her father passed away, then we had to commit my mother in law to a dementia care home. Then she finds that when she didn't follow up on a positive test result in the middle of all of this until just now, she indeed had cancer. They've done the surgery now and tests show she's good so far and starting her chemo. You can't imagine how many times I've drawn on you for encouragement to her, and courage for us all. Your blog reaches much further than those who read it my dear. As always, you are living out the purpose that the Good Lord has for you and you are serving others in the process, right from your chemo chair! Hugs and hugs! Love you back! Karen

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  3. Hi Rebecca......I want to wish you and your precious family a very Merry Christmas!!! I know you are going through a difficult time, but I am so thankful to know that you have a loving family and great friends that are with you and lots of people are praying for you. The Lord is near even if there are times you feel like He's not there. You are a strong woman and I know the Lord is going to bring you through this and you will have an awesome testimony. God bless you and your family and I pray the New Year ahead will bring you lots of joy, laughter, great health and many blessings!!!! Lisa Gallardo

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    1. Thank you, Lisa! Happy New Year! I appreciate all your support and encouragement so much!

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  4. Being bald again is right around the corner for me. We had family photos taken today while I still have hair.

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