Anyone who follows my blog knows about the guy I was dating...the deal breaker guy. He's the guy that just made sense. It felt right. The connection was instant. The connection was real. The first time he hugged me, I turned toward him to kiss him because it just felt right. Then I caught myself and stopped. It came so naturally. But then he decided that my baggage is too much. And it's over despite the fact that I don't want it to be over.
I've been on dates with four guys since then. The first guy... We went on a date and I just felt a heaviness the entire time. I felt sad. I felt disappointed. He was nice. He was handsome. I felt nothing.
The second guy... Thirty minutes into the date I figured out that he's a white supremacist. It lasted long enough for me to say goodbye.
The third guy... A vegan. I don't mean to be judgmental but men eat meat. He is also a germaphobe. He tried to act like he isn't but I read people. I know. I want a man.
The fourth guy... We went to see deadpool together yesterday. He lives an hour and a half away...
Experiencing a real and legit connection doesn't happen often. When it fails, it's devastating. It makes it hard to settle. It's hard to let go.
The thing is...I've realized...I have a story. My life is a story. It's messy story. But anyone who chooses to be part of this story is lucky...it's a good story. A bloody and messed up love story. I'm no longer worried about if my story is too much. My story is epic. My story is worthy.
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