Saturday, February 13, 2016

The Dating Game

Deadpool.  A movie based on a comic. Full of action. Bloody at points that made me cringe. The movie ended and I giggled. A love story. A bloody and messed up love story. 

Anyone who follows my blog knows about the guy I was dating...the deal breaker guy.  He's the guy that just made sense. It felt right.  The connection was instant. The connection was real.  The first time he hugged me, I turned toward him to kiss him because it just felt right.  Then I caught myself and stopped.  It came so naturally. But then he decided that my baggage is too much.  And it's over despite the fact that I don't want it to be over. 

I've been on dates with four guys since then.  The first guy... We went on a date and I just felt a heaviness the entire time. I felt sad. I felt disappointed. He was nice. He was handsome. I felt nothing. 

The second guy... Thirty minutes into the date I figured out that he's a white supremacist. It lasted long enough for me to say goodbye. 

The third guy... A vegan.  I don't mean to be judgmental but men eat meat. He is also a germaphobe.  He tried to act like he isn't but I read people. I know. I want a man. 

The fourth guy...  We went to see deadpool together yesterday.  He lives an hour and a half away...

Experiencing a real and legit connection doesn't happen often.  When it fails, it's devastating. It makes it hard to settle. It's hard to let go. 

The thing is...I've realized...I have a story. My life is a story. It's messy story.  But anyone who chooses to be part of this story is's a good story. A bloody and messed up love story.  I'm no longer worried about if my story is too much.  My story is epic. My story is worthy. 

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